Bubble
Tonight, Governor Newsom ordered a shelter in place for the state of California! I watched the news feed and there were no reporters in the room. Questions from reporters were taken online or over the phone giving the whole dynamics of the press conference an other worldly feeling. About an hour prior, I had scheduled a tee time at Dragonfly golf course for two friends and I because it seemed like the only outlet that adhered to the social distancing rules. Shortly after the Governor’s announcement, this golf outing was cancelled because the golf course closed down.
It’s hard to capture the right words to reflect how I’m feeling. Our federal government shutdown and/or limited flights in and out of America, other states are following California’s lead with respect to “shelter in place” mandates, the National Guard is being activated leading myself and others to believe the rule of law will be replaced by martial law, and everyday there is something being taken away. This is probably the most disconcerting aspect because we (I) have no say in the matter. I feel as if I am a spectator in a game with no rules and the outcome directly effects my life even though I am not playing the game. I thought about driving up to the mountains to go on a hike, but the “what ifs” start chiming in my head and it doesn’t seem plausible, safe or timely to be away from home. I am also noticing people are starting to show cracks by posting on social media post-apocalyptic messages and pictures. I don’t know if they are afraid, stupid, or a mixture of both but what purpose does this type of communication promote?
Throughout the day, I worked on teaching responsibilities. I learned how to mass email my students and post lessons on Youtube. Everything I’m doing related to teaching doesn’t make any difference because the students are not going to be held responsible for completing the work. The dirty little secret is that if “one” student doesn’t have internet access or a computer or a way to pick up their hard copy assignments then everyone else does not have to adhere to the due dates or coursework requirements. Therefore, the word “requirement” cannot be used in our school lexicon. This was reiterated in our meeting the prior day which angered several veteran teachers, but what the hell; we can’t change any of this and there are no safeguards, measures, policies, guidelines, or laws in place to fix the problem. All we can do is move to online schooling and take one day at a time. Furthermore, I think it’s all about providing some measure of normalcy for the students rather than actually completing any assignments. I look at my children and they are lost. One lies in bed watching movies or Tik Tok, the other is caught in limbo between finishing high school and trying to keep his job at Dick’s, and the oldest is contracted as an instructional aide with our local school district with no work to complete because of the “shelter in place” order.
Beyond all the local changes, I observed on the federal level that in the prior 12-hour cycle Trump closed the northern border with Canada and southern border with Mexico, enacted some laws via presidential authority that have been on the books since World War II, and is trying to finalize the stimulus package which includes the bailout of the airline and cruise ship industry along with payouts of $1,000.00 to each adult and $500.00 per child. On top of all this federal spending, Trump is stating that unemployment rates may jump to 20%, the restaurant industry may be decimated, and this may drag on through July or August (and he leaked out as long as 18 months). With the recent events beginning in December 2019, I’ve noticed the word “may” is a pre-cursor to “will” happen. I don’t have to be Nostradamus to figure this out.
On a personal note, I am having extreme difficulties understanding my role in all of this. Watching the news or social media feeds makes me feel good or at the least numb to what is happening but afterwards, I feel like I’m losing my sanity one news feed at a time. I don’t know what the right decisions are or if there is a right decision to make. All I can do is sit in my bubble and look forward to a brighter day where our government does not dictate what we can and cannot do.