Welcome to my site! The Traveling Hmapa blog and web site was inspired by my collection of life experiences as a father, son, brother and husband; playing college baseball at Fresno State, professional baseball for the San Francisco Giants, owning my own business, coaching baseball at the college (Bethany University), junior college (Cabrillo Junior College), and high school (Scotts Valley High School and Clovis North High School) level; I served eleven years in law enforcement (7 years as a Santa Cruz County Deputy Sheriff and 4 years with the Clovis Police Department), and most recently I transitioned into teaching. I have my Bachelor’s Degree in English, a Masters in Education with an emphasis in English Language Development, a Teaching English to Speakers of Other Languages (TESOL) certificate, and a single subject English teaching credential. In December of 2023, I completed my doctoral journey and earned my doctorate from National University in Organizational Innovation. I love to read, write, and explore the deep recesses of human existence by daily seeking the essence of truth. Now that you have a snapshot of my external life, let’s dig a little deeper.
Looking all the way back to the winter of 2001, I spent three weeks traveling throughout South Africa with three other professional baseball players teaching baseball camps to middle school and high school age athletes. This experience set into a motion a chain of events that brought me away from baseball and planted the seed within my spirit that I wanted to travel. I am now actively pursuing my passions, dreams, and spiritual beliefs while embracing the Traveling Hmapa lifestyle. You may be asking what does “Traveling Hmapa” mean? In Thai, Hmapa means “wolf”. This animal was given to me by a dear friend who advised me that, like a wolf; I am constantly breaking out of prisons and self-constructed constraints to roam free down my chosen path. Further, it is a strong reminder of my ongoing passion to travel the world in search of new teaching opportunities and connecting with people on a deeper level to help them realize their dreams.
TURNING POINT: I feel sunrises and sunsets are markers of hope, nature’s guideposts, signals to a beginning and end, and in some cases, they throw down the gauntlet to stretch one’s self beyond the possible and attain that which was once unattainable. They are a gift which binds us all together. On the morning of April 24, 2018, the sun rose painting the sky with vivid blues and pastel pinks that set the clouds on fire. While driving to work, my internal dam broke drowning who I thought I was in a swift moving current that cleaned my soul, placed me on a path to purify my mind, and helped me to stand firm in my beliefs. I consciously embarked on a journey that painfully ripped off a mask which allowed me to unabashedly share with everyone I know, a pain that pierced all parts of my spiritual and mental capacities.
Before that meeting with fate, I internally wrestled with hurting myself, hurting others and the immense fear that I was going to go too far enforcing paper thin laws. I could no longer repress my need to physically comfort and express love to those victims who I was trying to be strong for.
One aspect that has been with me ever since I have had a cohesive thought running through my head is that I have never been able to stop tearing apart pieces of psyche as though the universe’s ocean is constantly pounding me into a smaller and smaller grain of sand. It’s who I am. I wouldn’t have it any other way but this constant internal chatter which has pushed me past many life struggles eventually evolved into a black hole. Answers eluded me while I fell farther into the darkness that enveloped all parts of my life. Not until my awakening (that’s what I call it now), did I understand the importance of allowing other persons to know my authentic self. Unconditional love is an amazing healer. Those pieces that lie in tatters on the dirt of life’s experiences are now actively being built up in a constant process forged in the fire of dwelling in uncomfortable situations, accepting and giving unconditional love, allowing people to know my authentic self, and searching for truth.
Along the way, many people have had the inclination to tell me what they think is real to them, their truth or what is worthy of worship, but I must be honest; I have quietly listened to the meaningless echoes sent forth from our bloated American religious leaders. None of it appeals to me any longer. I can’t help but question intentions, stare at our hypocrisy, stand in amazement at the unwillingness to listen, the inability to seek one’s own triviality, and the pervasive attitude to judge. My mind and spirit has always wanted to challenge everything and I don’t think I can stop until I understand myself. It is a deeper dive into why I am here. Am I making you uncomfortable? Great–because this is how I have felt my entire life. My hope is that out of the mud, as the sun rises; a beautiful lotus flower will bloom.